To everything that has happened:

To you who stalked my social media posts and deliberately broadcast it blow by blow to every person you talk to.

To you who followed this blog and made everybody know what’s in it which I do mind because I do and that was just so off.

To you who made me feel like I’m your little sister, that you would only mean good to me, that you were always there for me, that you care, news flash you really don’t.

To you who post every second of your life but didn’t bother me because I knew it wouldn’t be you if not but you don’t even know how to return the favor.

To you whom I didn’t do anything wrong and then suddenly considered me dead because I hurt your friend and when anyone hurt your friend you’d be so much hurt too. News flash for me, all this time I thought I was also your friend.

To you who were so bitter to things transpired and caused the chaos to my life.

To you who listed all my flaws and lapses and everything you’ve done for me just to win that argument.

To you who raised your hands down, turned your back and hid your face when asked if you were my friend.

To you who’d been with me after I woke up from a three-hour sleep at the gymnasium because I was alone.

To you who’d seen my ugliest state in tears but never left me.

To you whom I thought really understands me but just left me hanging when things don’t work out for you.

To you who would just hug me and tell me it’ll all be alright.

To you who would always listen and loves me no matter what.

To you who just let me cried that night and never bothered asking. I’m not sure if it’s because you knew I wouldn’t tell or you are just waiting me to tell you.

To you who challenged me to make wiser decisions because you knew so much better.

To you who may not know anything but still have the power to cheer me up and smile.

Whichever shoe fits, wear and lace it up. Thank you, thank you for teaching me lessons I never would have learned without you. Today, I am far from being good but I am better now and I will be better each day. Time will come things will get to the way it has to be and I am a customer, willing to wait.

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That Baguio Escape

#THATBAGUIOESCAPE – This was originally written for a reaction paper for our educational tour. The City of Baguio is never peculiar to me because twenty years ago I was once there. Funny it is to say but I was made in Baguio just like any other delicacy from there. This tour will not be my first but I was so excited as always.This tour will be so short I thought and will be so exhausting and true enough, it was. But every downside has its goodness because personally I’d relish every moment this tour had brought me.

I don’t know why I’m feeling all agitated before our departure but I dismissed my frantic thoughts because we’d been blessed with a skilled and careful coach captain (driver). He and he’s caution while driving was also one of the reason why we’ve enjoy this trip.

February 27, We arrived at Baguio City before the sun rises and it was overwhelming, the fog, the coldness, and the stillness, all of it. At Burnham Park we bought time, we row a boat and went to visit Baguio Cathedral then we boarded at 7:00 AM for Philippine Military Academy (PMA) and our tour went over for the day. Second itinerary, Wright Park then went straight for picture taking at The Mansion. Third, at Mines View Park though we did not have time to see the view because at Good Shepherd Sisters, pasalubong buying made us so busy. Soon it was lunch time but we still have one itinerary left which is the Botanical Garden but we decided to skip it for early lunch. And then I slept, I woke up stuck in the traffic and we’re not even half near to SM City Baguio and it will be late for La Trinidad Strawberry farm and Eastern Weaving Room. So we all agreed to went straight Benguet then at 6:00 PM we began packing things up for Manila. But accidents happen accidentally so we got stuck at Leeza’s at Sison, Pangasinan to wait for them. But lucky we were, we went home to Cavite complete and bruise-less (physically, I think).

#THESTORYBEHINDSMILES

I don’t know but honestly it was half cooked, the enjoyment I mean. As much as possible, I try not to be too hard on myself. I smile for simple things, I laugh even on the silliest stuff, my heart beats fast with the sight of nature and creation and I can get too happy when people I love is happy.

But for the first time in my life, I felt insufficiency on myself because someone refused to be in my companion. It felt like a slap, seriously. I felt like having contagious disease, I felt ridiculous all the while, the entire trip. I felt pity for myself. Two consecutive field trips I had guy seatmates who were really bulky (HA HA!) I mean tall and very OC to tell you, but they did it, they never left me, never let me alone, they made me feel I was with them but with him? I don’t know which will I be more disappointed, either to myself or to the latter. I didn’t even plan to be his seatmate at all but I’ve seen the scenario out. Then at the bus, he told me he was not comfortable sitting, the space was too little, he wanted me to be comfortable having more space (meaning without a seatmate) etc. Then I thought he was as tall as my two former seatmates or maybe shorter than the two, he’s much skinnier and I am not big to occupy half the space but he still chose the center seat. I don’t know. I guess it could have been easier if he told me he doesn’t want me to be his seatmate, end of story.

#THERECOVERY

But the I knew everybody would have their own reasons for everything and letting everybody know is not really an obligation. My dilemma was a could-getover-would-getover situation, like I can live with that, its not a big deal. And that not all people will do as much as you did for them because they don’t have the same heart as you.